Love Your Job

Arguing with your Boss is like
'wrestling with a pig in mud'.
After a while, you realize that
while you are getting dirty,
the pig is actually 'enjoying it'.

Help a man when he is in trouble and
he will remember you
when he is in trouble again !!!!

Complex problems have simple,
easy to understand wrong answers.

It is not exactly cheating,
I prefer to consider it
'creative problem solving'.

Behind every 'successful woman',
is a man who is surprised !!!!

Whoever said 'money can't buy happiness',
didn't know where to shop.

Alcohol 'doesn't solve any problems',
but then again, neither does milk.

Most people are only 'alive' because
it is illegal to shoot them.

I'm not a complete idiot,
there're still some parts missing !!!!

Forgive your enemies but
remember their names.

The number of people watching you
is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father ....
- He said he wanted more proof.

Some pain is physical and some is mental,
but one that's both is dental !!!!

Life is pleasant, death is peaceful.
It's the transition that's troublesome.

Love your job but never fall in love with your Company,
coz'u never know when company stops loving u


fisal gaya mai kele k chilke per,
or ja pahucha sidha maikhane,
waha per mujhe milli jo maikahne wali,
toh mai bola aya hu mai aaj tera uddhar chukane
maikhane wali boli, pyar gaya yaaar gaya ,
or gaya viapar sun le ab tu ,
na hoga aage se udhaar,
band karna pad jayega yeh wyaapaar
kal se lekar aana poore paise
nahi to joote padenge hazzaar
mai bhi bola kitna nirdayi hai sansaar
bin daaru ke ab kaise ji paunga yaar
he uparwaale kar de maiy ki barish..
dikha de tu bhi aaj koi chamatkaar
magha re megha re,
mai k pyale barsa de,
daruwali Rs 20 pavve k leti hai ,
tu uddhar pila de,
aiye khuda aisa kuch jalwa aaj dikha de
aasmaa ke baadal se aaj daaru barsa de
barsa de daru ker de versha daaru ki,
kahin bijli karka k meri photo mat kheench lena


By Rajiv Walia
Mujhe laga ki zindagi ko samajhna aasaan hai,
par mujhe kya pata tha ki yahan toh har hoi pareshan hai.

Hum zindagi ko jitna samajhna chahte hai,
utna hi khud ko tadpaate hain.

AAj har koi zindagi se pareshaan hai,
par phir bhi maut kisi kisi par meherban hai.

Ye zindagi aakhir kya hai,
yaa toh ye gulab hai ,
yaa phir sharaab hai,
Shayad Is sab ke liye hum hi zimmedar hain.

Jo hum aaj mehsoos kar rahe hain,
Vo kal ka chamatkar hai,
Aur aane vala kal aaj ki paidaavaar hai.

Aaj hum iss baat par zara sa dhyaan karen,
Iss Jahaan main koi aisa nahin,
jiske liya hum khud ko itna pareshaan karen.

Lessons of life

Lesson Number One:
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"
The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson?
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson?
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Number Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
This is the end of your management course.

Shayeri for Sentimental Fools

"Teri aankhen hain ki dil ka aaina dikhati hain,
Kabhi sharm se jhuk jati hain,
Toh kabhi masti se bhar jati hain,
Kitni nashili hain yeh aankhen,
Par kyon yeh aansoo bahati hain."
Love hurts when you break up with someone.
It hurts even more when
someone breaks up with you.
But love hurts the most when the person
you love has no idea how you feel.
Bole vo dosti, chup rahe vo pyar,
milaye wo dosti ,juda kare wo pyar,
hansaye wo dosti ,rulaye wo pyar.
Phir bhi log dosti chhodkar kyun
karte hain pyar.
Pyar karke bhulana na aaya hamen,
kisi ke dil ko manana na aaya hamen,
kisi se tadapna toh seekh liya hamne, par
kisi ko tadpana na aaya hamen.
Meri khata toh kuch bhi na thi,
Jane kyun aap hi begane ho gaye,
Aapko lagta hai ki hum khush hain,
Magar hume hanse toh zamane ho gaye.